This article is part of a Prudential-supported series on mentorship, reflecting the values Prudential is known for: providing rock-solid guidance and helping others reach their goals.
When Kimberly Gladden-Eversley, 33, a military spouse and mother of four, was in a rough emotional place while facing a second deployment, she had an epiphany: Military spouses needed support from someone who understood the challenges—and she could be that go-to person. Ultimately she became a certified life coach, volunteering her spare time to helping other military spouses “find and execute their purpose from beneath the shadows of their active duty spouse." Her training came in handy, most notably when she befriended Iesha Shorter, 29—a stay-at-home mom struggling in her marriage to a military officer—who needed help turning her situation around. Here's how their bond began—and what it taught the two of them about the resilience that's possible when someone commits to being in your corner.
Kimberly says:
Years ago, while stationed in Groton, Connecticut, I started a jewelry line for military spouses. I wanted to create something that would allow active-duty spouses to feel a sense of pride as they served our country without wearing a uniform. I would hand-deliver my custom-made jewelry to nearby customers, including Iesha. From the moment we met, I felt her positive and vibrant energy. She is quite the Southern belle—naturally nurturing, generous with compliments, and with a smile that would encourage anyone to find joy in the simple things life brings. She was transparent, she was raw, she was truthful, and to be honest, she was me.
Iesha says:
At the time (2013), I was still a stay-at-home mom [with a young daughter]. When some people find out you’re a stay-at-home mom, they say things like, “You’re so lucky!” Like, no. It’s actually pretty draining. Your partner works so much, you barely see them. And when they come back from a deployment, they can seem like a different person. You can’t always talk to other women in the military community either. Some can be quite judgmental, especially when rank comes into play. But Kimberly—she knew from the beginning that my marriage wasn’t working and she provided the support I needed leading up to my divorce. We’ve been inseparable ever since.
Kimberly: I remember facing our second deployment right after giving birth to my third child. It was the first time I felt as if I were crashing and losing myself. My anxiety levels were higher than usual, which evolved into a continuous battle with panic attacks, irregular heartbeats, and vertigo. My stress was breaking me down mentally, physically, and emotionally. After a series of cardiology and doctor visits, I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder and offered medication to decrease my symptoms. I felt misunderstood by medical providers who lacked understanding and experience within the military spouse community. That’s when it hit me: I wasn’t alone. Spouses need support from someone who truly understands them. Eventually I became the go-to person in my community. My biggest wins and triumphs finally happened when I released myself from needing permission to relentlessly be who I am.
Kimberly: What began as a friendship later evolved into mentorship, allowing us to build a deeper connection. Our conversations were like a pendulum swaying in whatever direction Iesha’s emotions took us. Some days we laughed. Some days were full of tears. Coaching is a goal-oriented process: We use our grief as fuel to get the fire going and make our vision a reality.
Iesha: When she started coaching me, we did an intake session and made a vision board. It showed me going back to school to become a veterinarian, getting myself to a mentally stable place, buying a house, and just being happy.
I knew my marriage was going down. So I was like, I gotta make money because I need to take care of myself and my child. Kimberly said, ‘Go back to school—be with the animals.’ So I applied for a job as a Pet Care Specialist [at a specialty pet retailer] and started school a month later. I eventually want to have my own veterinary practice, but I’m also thinking about getting my business license and starting an aquarium-cleaning service. Or baking birthday cakes for dogs. People always come in [to the store] looking for cakes and I’m like, “Hmmm... I could make that!”
Kimberly: Iesha’s resilience was beyond anything I’d seen. I would hand her some tools, and she would hit the ground running. Watching her fulfill her vision while hitting every single goal we’ve set together is so inspiring. The pain that comes with closing some chapters in our life may be the key that unlocks the door to a future brighter than we ever dared to imagine. Divorce sounds daunting, but Iesha redefined what divorce is for the modern-day single mom.
Watching Iesha fulfill her vision while hitting every single goal we’ve set together is so inspiring. The pain that comes with closing some chapters in life may be the key that unlocks the door to a future brighter than we ever dared to imagine.
Kimberly: People need people! People boast about their independence while failing to realize it is impossible to get anywhere without a tribe. We pray for help in the form of a miracle, without realizing that a miracle may be your neighbor, your friend, your coworker, or a random worker at the post office. Despite the heavy loads we carry, there is always someone willing to lighten the weight if you let them. Bravery is not present in the person who bears the weight of the world alone but the one who dares to be vulnerable enough for others to help carry it.
People need people! We pray for help in the form of a miracle, without realizing that a miracle may be your neighbor, your friend, your coworker, or a random worker at the post office.
Iesha: Everybody needs someone to keep them on track. Someone who can love you through your ugly, pick you up when you’re feeling down, and remind you of your self-worth. I can tell Kimberly anything and she’s never judgmental. She holds me accountable for things I say I’ll do, always checking in like, ‘Hey, where are you at with this?’ And I, in turn, do the same thing for my daughter.
Interviews have been edited and condensed for clarity.
